“You’re Welcome”
[NOTE: This post was from 5/20/2008, but went unpublished]
Where has this phrase gone? I’ve stopped saying it, subconsciously. I think it’s because everyone around me doesn’t say it. Then, for some not concious reason the other day, I said it and was scowled at. I found that interesting.
We are, it seems, obligated to minimize our efforts that people thank us for. Instead of saying “you’re welcome” we say “no problem” or “no big deal”: We go out of our way to make the other party feel like their thanks was nice, but unnecessary-that our expended life energy on their behalf was somehow forgiveable and not worthy of mention- instead of making it clear that their thanks was necessary, and yes we did do something that they should remember- our life energy was expended for them, and is forever lost.
The scowl was because I committed a modern faux paux: My expression of “you’re welcome” obligated the thanker to acknowledge- internally at least- that someone did do something for them, and it wasn’t just “no big deal” or “no problem”, and they resented that.
So it ends now. The responses of ‘np’ and ‘nbd’ will be replaced with what they should have been all along: “You’re welcome” (or ‘yw’) and I heartily encourage everyone else to do the same.
